Wednesday, March 14, 2007
R.I.P ah ma.
I've decided to blog what happened the last 5 days that all came too fast for me.
On last friday night, i came back home. My parents weren't in. They were out at hospital with my grandma. That was 11pm then. When i slept at 3pm, they were still out. I knew it was serious. I went to sleep.
The next morning, i was awaken by my father. "wake up, wake up, ah ma's has only a few hours left." Off we went to the hospital. The sight of grandma with tubes running over her body on a life support system made my heart ache. First time i cried over a loved one. It was 9.25am. My cousin was supposed to touch down in spore at 4pm. Drugs were fed to keep grandma's heart pumping. Her hand was cold to the touch. Of course, everyone cherished their last moments with grandma by her bedside. My cousin arrived. Her last moments with grandma. It was decided that we stop the medicine and let her depart. The pulse rate dropped steadily till from 90 plus to 40 plus, then it was gone. The clock read 6pm. Sounds of weeping and runny nose turned to crying. My tears just flowed freely. I understood the feeling of heart pain at that moment. That was the time i cried the most bitterly. I knew she wasn't there anymore. The feeling of losing a loved one.
Thru out the wake, i don't really feel that sad. My mum said, if you understand all the recitals and chantings, you probably would have cried all day. I felt really sad when it was the last few minutes i could have to see my grandma's face before the coffin was nailed up. On the last day, tears just flowed freely again. I knew she was going to be cremated soon. At the crematorium, as the coffin was wheeled into the burner, i simply couldn't make out any words. I was stuttering and i felt like i was having hiccups.
In memory of my grandma.
I was told by my relatives i was being brought up by my grandma till the age of 6. I simply couldn't remember anything. Too young then. Whenever i thought of this, i would do a silent prayer thanking my grandma. Her face would etch deeply in my memory. Thanks grandma.
10:52 PM
